Throwing Tantrums, Maybe.................

I thought yesterday night would be a good opportunity to get drunk and sit around the house with Daryl. Oh, how wrong I was! The getting drunk part worked out fine, but the sitting around, forget about it. Ten minutes after I started drinking, I heard the baby monitor. Donny decided that even though I had just nurse him, he was hungry. So, we made him a bottle and he went back to sleep. Two seconds later, I hear him coughing up a storm. So I go to cuddle with him, but he wanted me to hold him. I held him for about a minute, got scared, and decided that I'd prefer for Daryl to hold him.

Why was I scared?? Good question. Well last month, March 1st to be exact, I had to go to work and Donny was kinda sick. So we decided that he should go to the hospital. But, seeing as I had to be to work, we only had 1 car seat, and my aunt doesn't drive babies minus car seats, I had to take Damian to work with me. So, I called my job, told them that I was running late, but still coming in (if I wasn't absolutely needed, I would so have not come in). So, I arrive to work an hour late, and Baggy Eyes has something to say about it. "You really can't come in this late to work, you're supposed to be in before the patients, blah blah blah." No thought crossed her mind to ask me why I was extremely late, with child in tow (This has nothing to do with why I was scare to hold the baby, but my blog, i can bitch as I please). By the time that I actually had work to do, my aunt came by with the car seat, and picked up my Damian. When I was almost finished with the interview(survey) that I had to do, Baggy Eyes comes into the room, asks me if I'm almost done, then tells me that they're going to keep the baby in the hospital. In front of the patient!!

After I leave work, my extremely nice aunt gives me and Damian a ride up to the hospital. Daryl stays for a bit longer, then he takes Damian home, and I take over there. Later that night around 8 or 9pm, Donny starts to cough and cry, I'm thinking that he's hungry, so I try to nurse him. But, he's actually crying because he's having trouble breathing. So, after I notice this, I tell the nurse(nurse1) who is already in the room feeding the other baby that was in there. She puts the baby down, and comes to check his monitor. The oxygen percentage is down to 80, supposed to be 100. She goes to get another pulse-ox monitor, to be sure that one isn't broken, and calls in another nurse(nurse 2). They use the other one and it says the same thing, that the oxygen level is going down. But, all this time, I'm holding him and I notice it going down and down, 75, 73, 68..... I can feel him barely breathing in my arms, and his little body is going so limp. Then nurse1 takes him, and she can feel that the monitor is right, immediately. Nurse2 called his doctor, who is all of the way across the hospital on another floor. By this time his monitor is 45, 43, 37....... Nurse1 goes into the hallway and calls in all of these doctors that were there. They put him on a nebulizer, which helped immediately, and his doctor came back soon after that. They gave him some steroids, and had him transferred to intensive care, where he stayed for a few days, then came home. Of course, I stayed with him in the hospital and missed two days of work. Baggy Eyes' comment, see here.

Now, anytime that I am intoxicated, I can't really get a good feel on his body. This leads me to feel scared that he may not be breathing, and I wouldn't notice. His father thinks that he knows that I wouldn't ignore his cries, and takes advantage of it. I don't know if this is true, it's of course possible, but I like to think the best of my baby. Which is that he's greedy and doesn't know anything about giving me, "me" time. But, at least then he's not playing with me like a doll.